Showing posts with label gladiators. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gladiators. Show all posts

Eighteen things I learned watching "American Gladiators"

Sunday, January 6, 2008 | Labels: , , , , , , , | 0 comments |

Things I learned watching the "new" American Gladiators.

  1. Unlike their Roman counterparts, American gladiators like to dress in spandex and hit foes with foam objects.
  2. Brush up on your family friendly trash talking skills before dueling with a gladiator
  3. Subway is the sandwich shop of choice for gladiators
  4. You have a better shot of being a gladiator when you grow up if you only have one name and it's a word like "mayhem," "wolf" or "fury."
  5. Once he was done helping the Wilcox family stand up for themselves, Shep Ramsey apparently didn't go back to righting interstellar wrongs, but rather, hosting the show called American Gladiators.
  6. Gladiators may or may not like the game of tennis, but that doesn't mean they won't use tennis balls to defeat their opponents
  7. Russell Crowe is not an American Gladiator
  8. Gladiators may or may not like the game of tennis, but that doesn't mean they won't use yellow, fury balls to defeat their opponents
  9. If you want to compete against gladiators, be prepared to wear either red or blue. People in green simply don't fight gladiators.
  10. When you beat an American gladiator, you do not get to kill him, rather you get 10 points.
  11. At times traffic could be really bad on the way to the old-school American Gladiators.
  12. Titan is always ready for a fight
  13. Emeril is a gladiator ref
  14. In America, pyramids are made out of styrofoam, not bricks made by Egyptian slaves
  15. If your Barbie doll is missing any hair, check for it under Hulk Hogan's skullcap
  16. If you have to get from point A to point B , expect giant Hershey Kisses to come flying at you.
  17. The Hand Bike is a great test of upper-body strength
  18. When you're done competing against a gladiator, expect to talk with Muhammed Ali's daughter